Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I can count

What's the funniest thing you heard in a movie theater?

I don’t buy bullshit

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Why are white women so hard to date?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Why do men want to suck dick?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Why do you think it is bad to allow people to self-identify as a different gender?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have a reading level above third grade

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I understand how hurricane paths work

Is it painful for men to wear bras, panties, and tampons?

I can read

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Why are fewer English people going to their local pubs for a drink? Are they aware that many pubs are shutting down due to lack of customers?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Why is the mainstream media, traditionally liberal except for Fox, not reporting on Trump like he's a traditional candidate who has ideas, values, and a concern for the common good?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t cotton to rapists

What is one thing which you cannot stop however hard you try?

I have complete contempt for fakery

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I actually pay taxes

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authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I see through liars

Why did my 2001 4.6 liter Mustang GT V8 make "only" 260 HP while today's base Dodge 3.6 liter V6 churns out almost 300 HP? Both benefit from fuel injection and ECUs.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

What is the one thing you don't understand that others do?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What should I do to stop being angered easily?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened